13 May 2010

I Think My Parents Know How Wild I Could Be.

• In a particular occasion during a holiday trip to Bali, Dad playfully asked us to go in a club...
We went in,
> I was nonchalant,
> Mom was anxious,
> Bro was indifferent.
A waiter asked for orders,
> Mom and Bro straight away said: Orange juice.
> Father was not so fast on choosing…
> I…, was looking around, then with a bored face said: Do you have Lychee Martini – shaken, not stirred?
(I could have sworn I was desperately holding back my laughter looking at my parents face; eyes were almost popped from their face!)
> Dad abruptly said: ok, but we share!
> Me: ok, dad, no problem, no problem at all…
(It is so cute how Dad wanted to ‘keep my daughter safe’ and ‘let her taste the world’, so to speak, at the same time.)
I think Mom was so shock that she kind of froze while I was enjoying the beat, on my seat – mind you, and sipping the martini…
> Both of them ‘advised’ me not to go to ‘such’ place without them…
> Me: Yeah, Mom, Dad, sure thing! (:p)


• Another holiday trip, another bar.
At Jogja, just a hotel bar… *evil grin*
After watching Ratatouille Movie with Bro at the hotel’s home theatre (Yes, they have a home theatre set! How cool is that!), we joined our parents at the hotel’s bar.
> Dad ordered (surprised, surprised!!), TEA! A plain, old, traditional Javanese TEA! Not that tea’s no good; I myself a big, huge, fan of tea, but c’mon, this is a drinking, indulging time! And you drink TEA?! Oh, c’mon!!
> Mom got me even more surprised than ever, ordered herself a good dose of coconut water with some kind of concoction, plus RUM! Oh, good ol’ Mom! Drinkin’ RUM?! Now this, I got to witness!
> Bro got himself a vanilla milkshake and huge waffle with ice-cream…
> Me, the adventurer of the night, got myself a tall, slim glass of Bloody Mary… (Oh, what a night!)
I did not finish my Mary, though, but I finished Mom’s rum (which she drank only a lil’ bit)! It was nice and sweet, just like Mom… (:p)


• I think they are aware of how wild their child, or any other person in the family, for that matter, could be.


• Sometimes I really am baffled on those parents who, despite the unforeseeable and highly versatile circumstances their children are in, still believe that the kids are still a good, naïve baby girl/boy.
> Puhlease! Open your eyes, people! A good, nice, sweet appearance is nothing!
You would not know them on your back if they do not want you to.
There are, certain advantages, where it might only be granted with a positive image, y’know…


• PS. Mom, Dad, I show you the ‘worldly’ me, because I want you to know that I can handle and take care of myself, and my drink… (:p)
All those drunk and sick moments? Whom else I dare to do if that with if not you guys? Because I know you will take care of me…
Because I know, I am safe with you… (^^)
With other people? I would not dare get drunk, I will be timid, or even more so when hanging out with my friends to the uncharted territory, for the lack of a better word…


LotsOfLove,
Lina.

To. My dear friend; O.S.

Old pal, I am sorry…


I was afraid.


Meeting you and your family was a huge step for me.


Via internet is one thing, but I draw the line on meeting ‘off-line’.


I am sorry; I backed-out on our friendship. I have no excuse whatsoever.


I was afraid.


I did not want to be the third party, even though I knew it was ridiculous and impossible.


But please understand that I did not want what happened to me, happened to your family.


It was a huge blow for me, as it would be for anybody else, including your family.


And I am such an awkward person; I did not know how to face you, or your family, in person.


Online, I can freely pour what I want to say, but I am such a goof when it comes to real face-to-face communication.


Those are not excuses though, especially when your family knew and agreed to meet me.


I think she is such a great person, and God bless you with her. ^^


I hope you are alright, pal…


I just recently thinking of blogging again and I saw your blog…


Sorry, I remember how hard it was for you, and I, inconsiderately, backed-out from our friendship.


Sorry.



Sincerely,
Lina.

My Love Is Undead.

Among the people I always look up to, there is one fabulous person I will always love dearly.


I saw him as the ideal person on earth, my epitome of an ideal living.


But he destroyed my heart long ago, shattering it to pieces.


It turned out that he is just a mere human who is capable of hurting others.


(Boy, was my illusion shattered…)


Took me a darn long time to pick up the pieces and rearrange it to a suitable picture.


Years by years gone by, I have yet to finish it, to decide again, who he is in my life.


My love for him will always be there even though he hurt me.


Actually, not me, but one other person whom I value and treasure greatly in my life.


But the betrayal, the tears, the screaming and shouting; the lost home, drove me to the brink of my sanity.


Even now, I have yet to finish the puzzle of his identity in my life.


This is a million-piece puzzle.


Times and times again, I made mistakes; the pieces did not fit together, the picture is fragile and simply wrong, and it did not take a long time to fall apart, again.


I do not know if I want to continue living like this, but it scares me to forget and go on, for the love that is just like him.


He was my ideal living, but I have yet to find a replacement for that position which he let go when he deluded me.


Will I ever find someone like him, sans the betrayal?


Isn’t it funny that I am looking for a person just like him, when I know he betrayed us?


Love,
Lina.