18 February 2011

A Selfish List.

I want somebody to lean on;
Somebody who would hear me out,
Somebody who would calm me down,
          and rev me up,
Somebody who would understand when I want to stay quiet and just snuggle,
          or stay noisy and hyped up,
Somebody who would understand if I want to go out all day,
          or stay in all day,
Somebody who doesn't mind the serene rain,
          or the tranquil lounge,
          or the noisy bar,
          or the deafening club,
Somebody who could see how wonderful it is to be with my family and friends,
          yet would not mind to only be with me,
Somebody who would understand the enjoyment I relish from being in the crowd,
          or the calmness that I need from being alone,
Somebody who would protect me,
          yet understand when to let me roam.
Somebody who would support and believe me,
          yet understand when to stop my unleashing,
Somebody who understand this bitterness I have,
          and yet able to turn me to see the bright side of optimism,
Somebody,
          who would just love me,
                    in spite of every flaw,
                    in spite of every fear,
                    in spite of every lacking that I have,
Somebody,
          who would just love me the way I am.

Why would I show anybody who does not want me in my worst, my best?

I can't promise anything but me;
          No money,
          No nothin',
          Just me.


This long list is selfish.
          Nobody is perfect, yea?


This is not something that I could appease by myself anymore.



In yearning,
Lina.

Bootcamp - Day 5

I missed it.
Missed one opportunity to make my life feels better.


Well, everything happens for a reason.
And I think I understand why things happened this time;

to remind me of my own mortality,
to not take things for granted,
to live more,
and to love more.




With Love,
Lina.