About Me

My Photo

Re-invented self re-exploring the world in the re-written views.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

This Bridge; To Cross Or Not To Cross

I'm not the stablest rock around
High and low not on my whimsical round
One moment a cheery cardigan
Another a choosy curtain
Distraction a constant bane and boon
Rapid thought a constant bane and boon

Curses lost, blessings forgotten

Relationship a strain
On my worry
And your pity

Heart's heart's creation
Passion's a blazing glory
Burned out a touch too quickly

Love is not the question
My mind's the motion

Love isn't what I fear
But future plays by ear
And past's a foolish queer

One fine day eyes would open
Feeling's an omission
Ardour might disappear on one light of day
This self becomes lost a long way away

The dread would consume me
Is this the end of we?

Unfairness is you escorting a broken soul
With sanity knowing holding tight is being hopeful

Because Love,
Would I subject love to such sorrow?
Because Love,
How profound could pain grow?

How would this nothingness manifest?

How would the abyss of nothingness after the grandeur of amorousness manifest?


Lost in loving,
Lina

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Contemplating Fault

Everything screams WRONG
Everything imprints WRONG

Shiver and shake stay within
Scare and start keep creepin'

Pushing back the time a futile attempt
Taking off the body brings contempt

A step closer a step of start
A day closer a day of doubt

You know it's going to be fine
And you'll be liking it!

We adjust
It's what we do.

Irrationality sounds rational
Fear feels normal

These moments a pageant of vulnerability
Defeating a mere quality

Still sins envelope
Still virtues lose hope

Agony imbues action
Uncertainty infiltrates cessation

At this juncture,
Do we say prayer?

We adjust; It's what we do.



Braving,
Lina. 

Monday, September 16, 2013

Fundamentally At Sea

Is this going to be one of my less lucid day?

I can feel me slipping from sanity

Letting go of the frayed rope of control

Relishing the sickening sensation of realisation

You know nothing
Nothing about me
Nothing about anything

I have no word

You let it pass

I can no longer return

You can no longer ask

I never want to cause you trouble
Never want to see you sad

Yet sometimes,
It's better if
They stab this heart
And shoot this brain;
Drown me in sleeping gas.


No longer fighting,
Lina.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Manifesting

You say what you want out loud and clear.
And there is nothing wrong with that.
And I have no such outlet,
Would you understand?
And I have no outlet,
Would you understand?

Is it a wonder sleep is such a refuge?
Is it a wonder leaving is such a bless?
Is it a wonder loving is easier from a far?

Holding back tears, biting tongue,
Lina.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

The Secret of The Heart

The little quirky thing that happens every so often:
Swallowing dinner...
Mom: Get ready, I'm going to matchmake you.


HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLP!!
Dearest, with all due respect;
I want to see the world!


Mucho Love,
Lina.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Are You Happy?

"Life is not worth living without happiness."

Are you happy?
It's complicated.

Am I not grateful for the people around me if I am not happy?
Is grateful enough happiness?
Is grateful living worth living over happiness?

I am grateful,
But I am happy?

I daresay I do not know.

Finding out whether life is enough with gratefulness.



Searching,
Lina. 

Is This Truly Goodbye?

The prospect of leaving and never coming back is daunting;
A piece of my heart will always stay,
This part of my life will always be remembered.

The intention to stay never existed,
Yet leaving is such a terrifying step.

The plan is now questioned;
Actions are now frightened.

Change is hard;
Change is needed.

The instinct to stay unmoved always kick in;
A push to different directions rarely appreciated.

Experiencing fear like no other;
Heart begging others to understand,
Mind stumbling over erratic thoughts,
And body simply has been. 



Still Lost,
Lina.

Love The Night Away

In darkness I spy glimpses
Of people writhing
Of people glancing

These instincts struggle
Grasping to break free
Just one more step to wild oblivion

Is it a wonder people fear?
Is it a wonder people tread to forget?

In my consciousness I resist
In my loneliness I keep

Somebody to touch
Somebody to kiss
This body yearns

Time to kill
Body to feel

The blaring sound provides silence
To fill with gasp and moan

How much temptation can one's heart take?
Lost myself, but not quite.

The pouring drinks,
The blasting beats,
The glimmering lights,
We lost our heads,
And let the hearts take charge
The rhythmic instincts as old as time

Letting go,
Indulge,
In desire as old as time

Is it a wonder people seek to give?

The fog intensifies;
Is it the air?
Is it our breath mingling in the night?

Tirelessly following these instincts into oblivion
Completely losing these minds into temptation

Look
Show
Close
Kiss
Touch
Writhe
To the morning rise...

Oh, so sweet
Oh, so lovely
We are
We are so lovely giving in...

Enjoy the dream 'til the soul's barin'...



Enjoy,
Lina. 

Oh, You Friendly People!

It is true what they say;
With every sip you feel enhanced...

Yet there is a moment when you know for sure that you are rather out of control...
'Cause things don't make sense no more...

Kept on biting ice...
Despair fell...
As I feel the euphoria ain't leaving...

With every sip, they chink what little consciousness left in me...


After a lifetime pride that I am never lost to the world,
And I still do not,
I can now understand why people give in, and how. 

Just a touch of the experience,
Got rational frightened the heck out of me...



Much Love,
Lina.