My Love Is Undead.

Among the people I always look up to, there is one fabulous person I will always love dearly.


I saw him as the ideal person on earth, my epitome of an ideal living.


But he destroyed my heart long ago, shattering it to pieces.


It turned out that he is just a mere human who is capable of hurting others.


(Boy, was my illusion shattered…)


Took me a darn long time to pick up the pieces and rearrange it to a suitable picture.


Years by years gone by, I have yet to finish it, to decide again, who he is in my life.


My love for him will always be there even though he hurt me.


Actually, not me, but one other person whom I value and treasure greatly in my life.


But the betrayal, the tears, the screaming and shouting; the lost home, drove me to the brink of my sanity.


Even now, I have yet to finish the puzzle of his identity in my life.


This is a million-piece puzzle.


Times and times again, I made mistakes; the pieces did not fit together, the picture is fragile and simply wrong, and it did not take a long time to fall apart, again.


I do not know if I want to continue living like this, but it scares me to forget and go on, for the love that is just like him.


He was my ideal living, but I have yet to find a replacement for that position which he let go when he deluded me.


Will I ever find someone like him, sans the betrayal?


Isn’t it funny that I am looking for a person just like him, when I know he betrayed us?


Love,
Lina.